Countdown

Wow . . . I've been so naughty. It's been six days since a post. I feel like such a slacker.

So I'm off to France in four days and I feel woefully underprepared. Sure, I listened to the "Emergency French" CD on Sunday with the woman who has a sing-songy voice saying MERE-cee and then a bunch of stuff that I can't follow even though she repeats it. Did she just say "come and suck my poo?" or am I just not focusing? Boy, those two weeks of French in high school are really helping out.

I'm only bringing two pairs of pants . . . easy enough. I would have probably worn the same pair of jeans all week anyway, since I would be at home. T-shirts are evidently not worn in France, though the Metro does sell them with the names of their stops on them, so shirts and sweaters are going to be a problem. Plus France is cold this time of year . . . so I have to decide on a coat. I'll just have to chant "There's an H&M" repeatedly as I pack. (I think it's even near our hotel!)

The Paris transit website does not offer weeklong passes to tourists (carte orange) so I have been fumbling through the RATP website in full on french. Because of this, it occurs to me that on the ATM I have no idea what "checking" and "primary savings" is in french, nor am I sure that I can find the right bathroom to enter. I assume that "grande soy latte" will still be "grande soy latte" but other than that who knows what I will be eating. I'm not even sure of the numbers, even though they were on Sesame Street all the time (one of the perks of living so near to Canada). I know that one sounds like "sex" (I think it's six) but for now I'll assume that price tags will have numbers. Let's hope that all the store clerks will A. want to practice their English or B. understand gesturical waving.

Oh, and I WILL eat some snails, even if it grosses me out so much that I have to eat McDonald's for the rest of the trip. There will be some snail eating.