Dancing Cats with Jessica Simpson

During this whole eharmony experience, there are two things that will make M close you out. Listen up, males of the blogosphere, anyone that mentions their cat or that they "enjoy dancing" is closed . . . with the curt checkbox "Based on statements made in this person's profile, I am not interested in this match." Today the nerdy eharmony demons matched me with someone who had both statements - can't live without his cat . . . loves to dance. CLOSE. Plus his profile said he was 33 and from his pictures he either posted pictures of his father or he was NOT 33. Maybe 33 plus 10 and then poking one eye and closing the other.

Now granted, males of the blogosphere, you are allowed to love your cat. I love Mr. Catman and I haven't ever touched him during his lifetime. You are allowed to shake your bootie . . . and enjoy every minute of it. You just shouldn't put them in your profile, cause you won't pick up wild and crazy girls like M and me. Under no circumstances should you lie about your age or post pictures of your father in the place of yourself. It makes for an awkward first date.

I know, I know, assuming that people would want to go out with M and I but we are kinda fun. And we can laugh about the concept of a cat in an eyepatch for, like, three hours intermittently.

As long as I'm on the subject of pictures - what is up with men and posting pictures? One would assume that the picture is supposed to reflect what you look like. The whole point is to see someone in person eventually. Yet some men have their senior high school picture, their ID picture from work, pictures with celebrities (Jessica Simpson, impressive), pictures with their girlfriend's cheek and arm still in it, pictures with the actual girlfriend (ex-girlfriend?) and lots and lots of men want me to see them running. Few people are attractive when running . . .

With the age of the digital camera, one would think that someone could take a current picture of themselves and slide it into eharmony. Come on guys, do it for all those families you want to raise! (they say that a lot on eharmony . . . with the cats and the dancing, it sets off the gaydar like mad)