Flora and the "est"s

The spirit of my Grandmother, Flora, escaped from whereever it was . . . and ended up in my body today. Again.

I was supposed to be xmas shopping. This means no shopping for one's self. Only petting the cashmere sweaters at Banana Republic and wondering if you should spend that much for a sweater for a brother that lives on the surface of the sun. But it is the perfect color. Would bring out the color of his eyes perfectly. And for $200 it should. But it was beautiful, and wonderful, and would probably go get a soda for you if you wanted it to (because it should for that much money) . . . or at least pick up a girl that could go get the soda. And yet, it has sooo many things stacked against me buying it. And then grandmother took over.

I had the strongest urge to buy lipstick. There are many, many shiny reflective things at the wonder mall and every time I saw myself, I thought "lipstick . . . need lipstick . . . must buy lipstick . . ."

Now my grandmother, she was all about the "est". As in coralest. The brightest lipstick, the most coral color she could find. Also the opaquest (or more correctly most opaque). And while I did not buy coral lipstick (because that would be a horrible mistake), I found myself at the MAC counter asking for the reddest lipstick they had. At the Macy's MAC counter that is "Lady Woo" but I didn't like the salesgirl, so I went to the Nordstrom MAC counter. There version of reddest is "MAC Red" and "Lady Bug" . . . and the salesgirl was all about my hair (it was faux-hawky today), so we were fast friends. Tried things on. Went with the MAC Red. A good blue red. Very much like the Wet n' Wild stuff I used to wear in college (M1 remember? I think you still have some in your bathroom, don't you?) except that this wasn't a dollar. Stays on the same way too. Gotta love a bright red lipstick that you can sleep in and wake up with lips still red.

Flora was not satisfied with just the reddest lipstick. I then went for the pinkest (and therefore I know how hard it is to get the MAC Red off). Bought something called "Pervette" . . . sheer but very pink. With a thick layer of this placed on my lips, Flora was somehow appeased. Amazing that I didn't have an urge to do something with my hair . . . or a hankering for crispy chicken salad. Maybe she flew off to make sure my sister is wearing enough mascara. Merry xmas Grandma, whereever you are. Thanks for the presents.

And thank you for saving me from buying the sweater.