Dear Pam

First off . . . PAM, you need to stop hanging out in my backyard AND if you are going to leave a phone number repeatedly for "Kim", you should leave a number that is in working order. Otherwise, I'll call, your voicemail will hang up on me and then we'll be right back where we started. I'd make you a poster but I really don't want to advertise to the world about who does and doesn't live here. And my mother keeps suggesting that I call the police.

(but she suggests that I call the police for pretty much everything . . . I don't know if she's thinking she wants a son-in-law that's a cop? If she feels that Berkley's finest doesn't have enough to do?)

So Pam, either leave an area code, working phone number, or maybe . . . just maybe, you should try CALLING Kim with that sucky phone of yours. And no, I still haven't seen Angel. But then again, I don't know if Angel is a person or a cat or what . . . so maybe I have seen her, or it, or whatever. Just stop leaving notes Pam.

I did learn how to block my caller I.D. from other's phones, so random notes are helpful in that way I guess.